I woke up today and received devastating information. On top of all of the cleaning, sorting and organizing that I had to facilitate around the house; the snow piles fresh from NYC’s latest winter storm; the list of errands that desperately needed to be run in that snow, the universe topped the mountain of “get it done” with one of my worse enemies: Financial challenges.
Although the challenge came about through no fault of my own this time, I still feel bummed when any financial strain hits our family. I hold on to the feeling that each monetary misstep is a direct result of my ADHD.
Before receiving the news that I had been hit with an unexpected expense, I was determined to take on the world (well my house and my to-do list) chest out feeling light, sexy and full of life. I put the world on notice, and BAM! Before I rolled out of the bed, I looked at an email that stripped away my light and sexy self-determination before I could try it on for the day.
if you declare war on your world, expect retaliation
My mood began to shift automatically. My head began to race with thoughts of failure, disparity, and disappointment. I was effing annoyed and it showed. My husband and two children became immediate targets. Eye rolling, condescending tones and even some harsh words. It didn’t last long but it lasted long enough for me to realize that I had allowed an email to prevent me from greeting the people closest to me with love and appreciation. I am proud to say that the morning did not end with me walking around crabby and unapproachable.
How to keep pushing forward
- Acknowledge the problem out loud
Telling my husband what was going on in my head, and actually hearing it outside of my mind allowed me to step outside of the situation and evaluate what was happening. My feelings about and my view on the situation were causing a serious problem. I am still annoyed by the new monthly bill that I found out about this morning. However, my feelings toward it won’t pay it. I’m going to have to stretch a little more this month. I am still blessed that my house won’t break down and I’ll find the money to pay it. Load Lifted.
- Choose to switch up
After talking to the hubby, I got my butt up and decided that a good shower and a cute get-stuff-done outfit would bring me closer to feeling better. I understand that my ADHD causes me to feel a little bit deeper, and the byproduct of those emotional surges take longer than what is seen as average to ware off. I knew that getting up and dressed this morning would be the rush I needed to help me jump the suckie-day hump! By Getting up, looking the part, and continuing to push in the direction that I desire was my sure-fire way start recovering from bad start to the day. Change your mind and the rest should follow.
- Feel Good by Doing Good
Just looking the part won’t be enough to get you back on track for the day though. I believe that in order to feel good you have to do good. I start my day at my Dry Erase white board and lay out the Tasks I feel I need to complete (really it’s my hubby’s football play board but I swiped it, and it has become an asset to me in managing my ADHD). This morning, I chose the easiest task I could among my fairly long list (Saturday chores, you know how that goes), with the mindset that if I start chipping away, each accomplishment, I would add to the uplifting of my spirit. Just do something good and you will start feeling the good. Despite all the things that went wrong throughout the day I made an effort to complete whatever thing I out to do. If I forgot or got discouraged I returned to the white board and kept it moving. I smiled inside as my actions changed my mind.
Even on a day of steep uphill climbs, I am able to feel successful in reaching toward the aspirations I set out for because I have systematically built a foundation to make that happen. And I’m blessed to be able to share it. I know that the year is going to be full of financial troubles and many other woes that life saves special for me. However, I am allowing myself to get off that treadmill of stagnant thinking ( I’ll never get out of financial trouble…just when I think I got it under control…how could I have not prepared for this….) I am going to choose to stick to the systems I set up, focus on achieving completion and stay positive. After all, there is plenty more money out here to be made if I Keep Pushing, Right?
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What is one challenge in life that fights hard to take you down and break your focus on being your best self? Leave a comment. I would love to hear about it, and I’m sure your story will help others.